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July 2

Put the Freedom of Forgiveness in your Heart

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The most common way people give up their power…
is by believing they have none.
-Alice Walker-

Gwen ranted on and on, reliving all the demeaning, unkind experiences she had endured with her husband, John. 

When someone asked her how long ago they were divorced, she said, “20 years ago.” Yes, she’s been suffering every day for decades, from something that happened 20 years ago!

It’s been said, that forgiveness GIVES YOU BACK YOUR POWER and sets you free

But after all you’ve been through, how do you find it in you to forgive?  These 3 ideas might make your mind more open:

  1. Understand that forgiveness does not mean excusing someone’s bad behavior. There may be no excuse for the contempt-filled conduct. 

Forgiveness does mean releasing yourself from the power which this unjust behavior still has over you!

2- Recognize that true forgiveness is the realization that something happened and you gave it meaning

What needs to be forgiven is the meaning you gave to the situation.

Understand, forgiveness is for you… not for the person you need to forgive.  As long as you see this person as guilty, then you’re still a victim, and you’re not yet free. 

Forgiveness removes his guilt, and thus heals your perception of being a victim. He’s not guilty… therefore you are not a victim. Then you are truly free!

Freedom of Forgiveness

Forgiveness removes the dagger of disappointment… Then you can begin to heal.

3- Grasp that you don’t need to know how you will find it in you to forgive

All you need is a little willingness to see yourself as something other than a victim… to see yourself thriving again, instead of just surviving!

And if you need more motivation, understand that forgiveness can delete and replace unconscious limiting beliefs which often cause you to see trouble where it is not… or to not see trouble where it is brewing. 

Beliefs which can cause you to repeat old patterns, so the same type of guy keeps showing up in a different body, and you keep reliving the same pain no matter who you are with.

SO, HOW DO YOU FORGIVE?  Here are just a few ways…

(Know that you don’t say any of this directly to his face. You don’t need be in his physical presence to forgive.)

  • A woman tells the story of a love affair gone wrong, and the bitterness she was left with.

Through clutched teeth and with just a little willingness to see things differently, she repeated over and over like a mantra for weeks… “I forgive you Jim, and I release you to the Divine… I forgive you Jim, and I release you to the Divine… I forgive you Jim, and I release you to the Divine.” 

This worked like a healing balm on her emotional turmoil. It deterred temptation to focus on Jim’s behavior and kept her focused on her own feelings instead. 

A few weeks later, Jim called. She didn’t want him back, but to her surprise the resentment was gone!

  • Here’s another means, “I forgive you__________________ for what you did to me consciously and unconsciously.  I accept your forgiveness of me for what I did to you consciously and unconsciously. Go in peace, as I go in peace.”
  • Then there’s the ultimate expression of forgiveness. “I offer you peace and happiness.” When you can sincerely, silently say this (not to his face, but in your mind), then you truly have freedom in your heart… then you are truly free.  

Understand, you can’t give what you don’t have… So, your intention to offer peace and happiness creates a vacuum which must be filled.

The result… you may suddenly find yourself flooded with peace and happiness, so you have it to give!  

 


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